Superman

This episode has been brought to you by a bottle of Riesling

So, movie #8 was Sydney White

No need to worry, I brought it

Genres: Some Geekery, Amanda Bynes, Fairytale

Highlights:

Amanda Bynes not crazy

all the sneaky geekery references

awkwardly based off Snow White

Lowlights:

They could've made her SUCH a geek

her hair. the whole movie. There is something off about it.

I mean, this movie is ok. Also, why is Amanda Bynes a genre? Mysterious. I sort of zoned out while watching this and read webcomics instead. Still, it's cute.

anyway, onto tonight's main attraction (attractive man whaaaaat)

SUPERMAN

 

Genres: Superhero, Action, Fangirl

...does the Fangirl genre count if I'm the only fangirl?

yes.

So, this is the story of Kal-El, who was sent to earth as a wee babe because his native home of Krypton was about to BLOW THE HECK UP. He is adopted by a possible Minnesotan (Jonathan Kent, I'm looking at you I DON'T CARE THAT SMALLVILLE'S IN KANSAS PEOPLE MOVE OK) and Martha Kent, whose sister/cousin lives in North Dakota, so obviously she's a native Minnesotan too. He grows up with apparently no memory of his years spent in a space pod learning about things, and becomes an unpopular guy who has to put all the football...armor...? uniforms??? in a tidy row on a bench before he can leave. I assume he leaves the football gear on the bench overnight because there is no weather in Smallville other than Corn-Growin' Weather. Smallville is made of corn.

Clark Kent then finds out that his adoptive parents have been keeping a space pod in the garage for his whole life, and he sets out on a grand journey to... the north pole? It could be Antarctica, but I think the norther ice shelves are more believable, since he doesn't know how to fly yet, and how would he get money to go to Antarctica. Anyway, Clark throws his magic crystal and it grows into a Knowledge Center. He then becomes super hot aka Christopher Reeve and realizes that what he thought was his real identity has to become his secret identity because he's actually an alien.

My favorite thing about this film (other than CR) is the director's vision of Space. Like, all the space objects. All those funny lights and blobs. What are those supposed to be?

Also, how do Superman breathe in space?

Let's talk about how great Lois Lane is. She's one of my favorite lady romantic interests in a Superhero film. She's all, "EFF YOU DANGER. I LAUGH IN THE FACE OF DANGER"

 She's all, "THIS JERK IS TRYING TO ROB ME, HUH? IMMA KICK HIM IN THE FACE"

Also, I am aboslutely 100% sure that Clark Kent spends all his time using his x-ray vision to creep on people. He is just that kind of guy. Also, this means he can see Batman's underwear. Batman is not in this film, but I'm just thinking of the future. Also, pretty sure Batman wears like, non-interesting sporty underwear.

Highlights:

Everything. This movie is amazeballs

Lowlights:

Lois Lane when she starts screaming. Although very brave, I think she only likes danger that she's a willing participant in. Also, her screams are super annoying

Not enough dorkery from Clark Kent

Um, other things about this movie. I'm probs going to watch Superman II tonight too, but by then the bottle of wine will be gone, and no one wants to read what I type when I get to that point.

I really like Lex Luthor. As I mentioned in my discussion of Thor, I am not a Loki fan. But yes oh yes I am a fan of Lex Luthor. In many ways he is the opposite of Loki

Here is a list of ways they are opposites:

1. Loki has stupid hair, Lex generally has no hair

2. Loki is an alien, Lex is not an alien

3. Loki does not attract the sexy dumb ladies. Lex does.

4. Loki's main antagonist is... Thor? Lex's main antagonist is not Thor

ways they are alike:

1. Loki and Lex's rival is an alien!

2. They both are sort of evil geniuses. Lex Luther is more of an evil genius than Loki, tbh

4. At some point in time they both have underground penthouses. Um. Hideouts. Secret Lairs, that's the word.

5. 

so there is that. 

Also, Lex Luthor was originally a ginger. 

OH MAN I ALMOST FORGOT TO MENTION MY FAVORITE THING ABOUT THIS MOVIE.

SUPERMAN IS SO EFFING POLITE AND DORKY. 

He's always, "goodbye!" or "have a nice day!" or "hello!"

This is why I love Superman. Yes, Batman may be my favorite superhero, but Superman is a very close #2

Alright. Going to finish this bottle o' wine, and yes, I will enjoy it.